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ISSN: 0974-892X

VOL. VI
ISSUE I

January, 2012

 

 

Dipanita Gargava

At Last

Uncontrolled tears rolled down my cheeks wiping the make-up that I had put on while getting ready for the party.
Sunita was in a cheerful mood today. I had never seen her so cheerful. She had always had a grin sad face as if she had lost but today everything was against the rest of the days. She had won. She had done it .Sunita the maid working in my house since the last 12 years had done a commendable job. She had undergone a hysterectomy operation ..........
Really! 1 I could not believe how she gathered up the courage to do so. My ears could not believe what she was saying. She was a tall, slim dark complexioned girl with very sharp features. Although she was dark complexioned she was very attractive. Her deep blue eyes had lots of grief embedded in them. Married at an early age, a girl belonging to the tribal clan of Jhabua, she had come along with her husband to Indore in search of a job. She had been working at my place since the last 12 years. Her orthodox husband would not allow her to talk to anyone, work anywhere or let her go out. My house with my parents, husband and daughter proved safe for her and she was allowed to work at my place. Her husband, Bharat, worked in a press in the distribution cell. At first things were normal. He use to receive his salary on time, they did not have any issues and so on. But this was the initial stage.
Slowly situations began to change, turning towards a darker side. The press was irregular in making the payment. In the meantime she conceived for the first time. The first issue was a girl. This aggravated Bharat who started pressurizing her to have a second issue. Things started becoming abnormal and difficult as she was regularly beaten up. Her husband abused her and she had no option but to keep mum. Once, a cheerful Sunita slowly began to grow serious. She used to only speak when spoken to. But I could sense the pain buried in her eyes ,her wounded heart which had deep love for her daughter was regularly pinched by her husband because he could not tolerate the birth of a girl . His friends use to tease him saying 'what happened .......a girl again'.
Sunita conceived for the second time and Bharat was dead sure that this time his wife would deliver a boy who would represent his family. No one would tease him. Discrimination was evident in his words. He hated girls.
'This time it will be a boy" Bharat would say.
'How do you know? It is not in our hands" Hearing this from Sunita he would raise his hands to beat her. ‘You unfortunate creature how can you say so’?
' Didi " this was how she used to address me. ‘Will I have a boy this time’? and when she would ask this she would burst out crying. For hours she used to sob. ‘What If I deliver a girl again? He will kill me. He will leave me get married again to someone who can give him a boy as his heir".
‘Is it in his hand" I got irritated. Uneducated people are hard to tackle and this was the case with her husband .Although Sunita was uneducated she was a sensible lady. "Never mind if you have a baby girl" I consoled her. "Even I have a daughter who is no less than a son to me" "But thing are not the same here as I am deeply hurt by his piercing words which pinch me and I am deeply wounded. I tried to console her by saying that things will be in her favor this time and that she should have faith in God. But in some corner of my heart I knew that if she had a son all would go well...... but if again a daughter then what would happen?......again a third chance. O! No... The very thought of the third issue made my hair stand. helped her in every possible way. I used to provide her nutritious food so that she could remain healthy. She needed work.. she had to. She was in need of money but more than that solace which she use to get by talking to our family members specially my mother who use to enquire every day about her health.
She was an egoist. She never accepted money. If we gave her as loan she would make it a point to return it on time. She was treu, honest sincere and determined. Very few people have all these qualities together and she was one of them. But when it came to asking about her husband she would not say anything.Days passed. She toiled hard to keep pace with work both outsid as well as at her own place. But things proved unfavorable for her as she gave birth to a girl child again. Again the humiliation, the torture, the letting down, unwanted piercing words....
This went on. Each time she wanted an operation, he husband would beat her, torture her. If she spoke about an abortion he would pass a sarcastic comment....." why is it someone elses?"She would sit mum. Days passed.....months passed. She did not say anything. Perhaps all was embedded deep down with her heart like a dormant volcano. She was now a mother of five beautiful daughters who were ignored by their father who still had hopes that sunita would deliver a boy. Sunita loved her daughters, worked for them and she was ready to do anything for them, tolerate anything for them. Again she was pregnant. This was the sixth time. I would scold her” why ....why again are you not conscious of your health. You will die. Who will look after your children?'
She would reply....this time it will be a boy... I had gone to the babaji .He has assured that it will surely be a boy. Let Bharat become the father of a boy. He is desperate. Perhaps with the birth of a boy all my troubles will end.
I too wanted that she delivers a boy because I could not see her undergoing all these tortures every day. I felt helpless and disgusted. I could do nothing for her. At times I felt like bashing up her ignorant husband who thought that she was solely responsible for the birth of a girl each time."Didi...' this was how she use to address me." Pray that this time I give birth to a baby boy. Perhaps this will bring an end to all my sorrows and sufferings."My modern views were shattered. How could I differentiate between a girl and a boy child when I know I am the the mother of a daughter. For me both were equal. But by praying like this was I not giving importance to the boys?No I consoled myself this was not for me but for Sunita that I was praying. I had to think of her..... her miseries,, her sorrows and that is why with a heavy heart I reluctantly said I would surely pray for her.
My daughter was standing beside me when the conversation was going on. Hearing the conversation she ignorantly asked,” mummy are boys better than the girls? Are we not good? Why does everyone want I boy? There were no words.... no answer to the question that had originated in her innocent mind.
Sunita's prayers were answered. She delivered the sixth baby and it was a boy. She was not at all excited as her health was deteriorating. She was sure that now all her troubles would come to an end. Now she was a bit relaxed. She thought now her husband would be satisfied. But this was not so. Her joys were shattered because Bharat was not satisfied with one son. For him his wife was a child producing machine. Within the next few months Sunita was expecting again.
As soon as I heard this I was very annoyed. Do you not understand what I had explained to you? Are you a fool? are you not concerned about your health? I was teeming with questions to which I did not get any answer from Sunita's side. She kept mum. Tears flowing from her eyes, she trembled like a pale leaf."didi what could I do”?” why could you not protest"? "I feel like bashing up your husband publicly."
"No didi don't do so. He will not leave me. He will beat me. I can no longer bear all this".
"But if you want to survive then you must protest” This cannot go on You are not a child producing machine do you understand. You have to stand against his decisions".
But"
"No ifs and buts... you have to, otherwise you will not live for long. If this be so then who will look after your childern? What will be their fate? Think about them if not about yourself. Are you not concerned about their future?
"Didi he says if you protest then I will leave you and go away"
"This is not so easy. How can he say so? Be firm. Don't be scared. we all are with you"
Days passed.... months passed and finally the day came when she delivered the seventh child. It was a baby girl.
She had taken leave. After one and a half month today she had turned up again......
"How are you Sunita? Not...she started fine" she looked weak but there was a glow on her face.
'Didi can I continue the job?"
Why scrubbing the floor. I was busy with my work. Unnoticed she came and stood by my side. I was so engrossed that I did not hear her footsteps. She stood silently When I raised my eyes I saw her.......She wanted to say something.
"Yes Sunita, what is the matter do you want something? Perhaps advance".
"Didi I have undergone an operation. I have protest against his wishes. We have won. Now no more. I will now be able to look after my daughters give them all the love and protection that they deserve.
"What about Bharat...what were his reactions on hearing about the operation?"
With determination on the face and an endearing sparkle in her eyes she replied....."I don't care" there was determination on her face.